Urban Scout For Hire!

Ideally, a wealthy philanthropist with anti-civilization philosophy sharing my sense of humor will fund my project by giving me a million dollars. Rich anti-civilizationists, please send me an e-mail at urbanscout (at) gmail (dot) com.

Short of that I need an experienced grant writer who likes my project and will right grants for it. Experienced grant writers with anti-civilization philosophy and my sense of humor, please e-mail me at urbanscout (at) gmail (dot) com.

If I can’t find that, I need to get an advance from a publishing company to finish writing my book, Born to Rewild. Publishing companies who like my writing and want to give me an advance to finish my book, please e-mail me at urbanscout (at) gmail (dot) com.

If I can’t find that, I need to have a realityTV production company produce my Urban Scout’s Crash Course show (I came so close to this one!). If you work for a realityTV production company, please e-mail me at urbanscout (at) gmail (dot) com.

While waiting for those pipe-dreams to pan out I will run my Urban Scout Sunday School classes again starting in March.

…In the meantime I’ll need to find another way to fund this project which probably means:

• Part-time work (20 hours) that
• Pays over $10.00p/h
• Has good benefits, even at part-time
• Has side benefits; free/discounted food or useful stuff for rewilding
• Leaves me feeling energized
• Has something to do with rewilding
• Takes place in Portland
• Where I can learn something new about rewilding
• Has awesome co-workers
• And starts immediately

Ideal Part-time Jobs:

• Learning to KJ at a non-smoking establishment
• Working to dismantle things (demolition crew?)
• Rewilding tutor for teenagers
• Expresso House Barrister
• Local farmers market
• Local organic food store

• ?

What I have:

• 5 years experience working as an environmental educator
• Deep knowledge base of civilizations flaws
• Street Credentials from the University of Life
• Web Design skills
• Photoshop skills
• Final Cut Pro skills
• Videographer skills
• Sewing Machine skills
• Microsoft Word skills
• Film Production Assistant skills
• Barista skills
• Acting skills
• Loin cloth skills
• Scriptwriting skills
• Just plain old mad skills, yo.

Yes folks, I have gone underground and become a soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find me, maybe you can hire… Urban Scout. (cue theme music) Seriously though… Any ideas?

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